Calvary Prophecy Report

I have been filled with extreme anger, resentment and revenge since my divorce (which lasted almost three years and was final in Feb.) For a few weeks after the divorce I finally felt a wee bit of peace. Then the anger and revengeful feelings stirred up again. I think it has to do with the fact that my ex is going to be marrying the woman (who is very controlling and manipulative) that he had the affair with in two weeks. I put on a happy face in front of my seven yr. old son and yet I cannot seem to get past this. I pray asking God to remove these feelings and to help me do His will, but they just keep occupying my head. Any suggestions?  

Signed,

Hurting one  

Answer
Hurting one: 

I am assuming that your husband had an affair and you were totally faithful throughout the marriage.  I say this because there is always a price to pay whether it is one sided or two sided.  Certainly the wages of sin even by one side is devastating and both sides feel its destructive nature several generations deep.  That doesn't even take into account friends and acquaintances.  This is a good example of how the effects of sin hit even the innocent. 

But back to your question!  I have counseled many who are in your situation. The first thing you must do is find forgiveness for the person who has wronged you.  This is probably the toughest thing a person can do, but you're not doing it for your ex-husband but for yourself.   

Let me explain.  When you get angry, resentful and bitter toward another person it only affects you and makes you a very unhappy person.  It also has a toll on your children, family and friends.  Obviously, they're going to be involved in some form or fashion.   

I am assuming that your ex-husband knows that you are angry and bitter toward him.  If that’s the case, you need to let him know that you forgive him.  Of course, before you do that you need to ask the Lord to help you through this because this won't be easy.  Ideally, it would be best for your ex-husband to ask for your forgiveness, but frankly, with all things considered, I wouldn't expect that to happen.

Once you’ve done that, again pray and ask the Lord to lift this great weight of anger and revenge from you.  You may have to pray this everyday before you are truly free.   

A pit that many fall back into is, after we have forgiven the person, we continue to bring up damaging thoughts about the person replaying the past until we are in the same state of anger, resentment and revenge.  You must at all cost avoid walking into Satan's trap. 

Remember, your life is in the Lord's hands no matter the circumstances.  He will work things out for your good (Romans 8:28) even though you don't understand it at the time. 

Of course, we don't always understand why things happen and may not until we meet the Lord in the sky.  Actually, when you meet the Lord, the things of this world will be long forgotten (Isaiah 65:17).  But now is the time to trust the Lord from this day forward and let Him do His will. 

I hope this has helped you.   

Terry Malone
Calvary Prophecy Report

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